Lanced!: The Hoff
When I was a wee lass, I loved Knight Rider. I even had a huge poster of Michael Knight in my bedroom (sorry, Lisa H.!). But as I matured, I came to realize that David Hasselhoff is one of the scariest human beings on the planet. I mean, you've seen the video, right? The one where he surfboards in a parka and chomps on a giant fish? This is what you have wrought, YouTube.

I've selected The Hoff as today's Lanced because of this lovely gem of a story from Starpulse: Apparently, David wants to be buried in a glass case under his Walk of Fame star when he dies. Of course if you read the whole article, you find out he was clearly joking about this to People magazine. But really, what's the fun in celeblogging (I just made that up, do you like it?) if you actually, you know, get to the bottom of things?

And seriously, just try to stop looking at this picture.